dongstomper69:

stunningpicture:

Creative kid. More creative mom.

fucking idiot got owned

thatsmoderatelyraven:

i bet people dont understand that im joking 800% of the time

smilingslowly:

spookywhiteghost:

fuckinglesbian:

princessnausicaa:

my mom tried to teach our goats to pee in one certain spot by giving them treats when they’d pee in that spot

except that

they think that now whenever they pee they get a treat

so whenever they see my mom

they pee

 laughed for a solid five minutes

behaviorism gone wrong

Pavlov is laughing in his grave

welcometotheworldofwonder:

tortellinigirl:

IM AT CHURCH CAMP AND THEY ACCIDENTALLY JUST STARTED PLAYING SHOTS OVER THE LOUD SPEAKERS .
THE FIRST LYRICS ARE LITERALLY “ARE YALL READY TO GET FUCKED UP” .
YOU CANNOT EVEN BEGIN TO IMAGINE THE FACES OF HUNDREDS OF HOMESCHOOLED CHRISTIAN TEENS UPON HEARING A SWEAR
U DONT EVEN KNOW THE PASTORS JUST CASUALLY KEPT DANCING WHILE THEY STRUGGLED TO TURN IT OFF AHHHHAHAHHA

A swear

kingdomheartsnyctophiliac:

OKAY THE FACT THAT ‘IMAGES’ IS NO LONGER THE SECOND LINK ON GOOGLE IS DRIVING ME UP THE WALL

NO I DON’T WANT TO WATCH VIDEOS

NO I DON’T WANT TO GO SHOPPING

JUST TAKE ME TO THE FRICKING IMAGES

hate:

i wouldnt even text me back

heritance:

Never fuck with someone who cries when they’re mad. They’ll stab you 48 times and cry in your stab wounds.

princetuggey:

chuck e cheeses full real name is charles entertainment cheese and honestly i feel appalled and lied to

pitbullfan:

i tried making a gang once but it turned into a book club

  • author: she didn't want to eat dinner because she doesn't like chicken noodle soup
  • english teacher: even though it doesn't say it, we can infer that 17 years ago she encountered an attack from chickens while on a trip to africa visiting her great aunt who was dying from pneumonia which she got from chickens that were being harvested for the great feast
  • tumblr: lol fukin stupid teacher
  • loki: blinks
  • tumblr: do you see this? do you see that blink? that fucking blink. it shows how much pain he has inside of him. look at him. all he wants is his father to love him. look at the tears that he is holding back. he's never been the favorite son, he always knew that he didn't belong. this is the fucking blink that makes me love loki. he's not a villain. he's just a scared, lonely child.